Friday, December 09, 2005

notes from above ground 6

Dear Sir, Well they had to evacuate the whole camp this afternoon because of a bomb threat. Unfortunately it was just that, a threat. The Horseman’s Ball was a huge success. I was invited, and wore my new uniform which I trimmed up with crocheted collars and hand sewed epaulets. A little sewing here, a cut there and viola, Fredrichs of DeKalb. I thought it was a costume Ball ala Mardi Gras, so came as Medusa. It wasn't a costume ball, but was Fancy dress. Well even so, the adders were a big hit. I had taken the precaution of having their poison sacs removed, but no one else knew that. They still could give you a good nip though. Their fangs are like razors. I had one hell of a time keeping them on my head for even a short while. I had superglued their tails together. That is one terrific glue. Well they fell off right in the middle of the blue skirt waltz, and all of those snakes tried to take off in a different direction which resulted in a lot of hissing and biting of each other and anyone else that was near. Finally six of them started off with a common goal dragging a few resistors. They disappeared into the bell of a band member’s tuba which got dropped in the melee. Well you can bet one musician is going to be in for a surprise when they drain the spit out of their instrument. Everyone was pretty angry with me, and I was so mortified that I fled the whole affair losing one of my new slippers in the haste of my departure. I had such difficulty finding my size too, size six triple E width. Almost perfect, perfectly round. My last pair I had bronzed and made into an umbrella stand. Perhaps some prince will find it and go off in search of the right umbrella. Truly Yours,

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